Q: How do you treat sexual difficulties?
A: Sexual difficulties (e.g., sexual anorexia, desire discrepancies, premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, sexual pain) are common. I use use a sequential, task based approach that consists of weekly communication, touching, and educational experiences that are customized to address the specific topic that the couple wishes to address. Experiences are fine-tuned to each couple’s needs so that they can progress through the exercises at a good pace. Depending on the treatment goals, couples may progress through the tasks within 12-14 weeks (if they find time to engage in one communication, one touching, and one educational experience per week). Couples can also choose to do a sexual retraining weekend intensive or a week-long accelerated retraining instead of weekly sessions.
Q: What is the difference between sex therapy and sex addiction therapy?
A: Sex therapy is indicated if sexual “dysfunctions” (see the aforementioned examples) are the primary topic to address. Sex addiction therapy is indicated if one or multiple addiction(s) are present that have impaired the couple’s psychological, emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy. In the case of an addiction pattern, the treatment focuses first on helping with containing the addiction response so that the addiction patterns no longer interfere with the couple’s well-being. Experiences are fine-tuned to each couple’s needs.
Q: In our previous treatment for sex addiction we were advised to stay sexually abstinent as my partner recovered from sexual addiction but we are ready to get develop our sex life after recovery. How will you work with us?
A: If you sought treatment for sexual addiction, I use the Sexual Reintegration Approach that is one of the 30 Tasks that were developed by Dr. Patrick Carnes. Depending on the specifics of the sexual addictive behavior that you (and/or your partner) has worked on, we will adjust the sex therapy process to match your intimacy exercises with the treatment goals that you embarked on for your sexual addiction. I will be able to determine this upon your completion of the intake process.